come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
