I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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