what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
