Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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