I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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