I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
