"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
