she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
