doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
