he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
