we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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