we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
she woke up with a sticky ear
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
