"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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