That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
He shit in the fireplace
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
