I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
