I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Randomize
