You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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