do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
