every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
