now i know why i became what i already was.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
