If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
where does the pee come out of this thing
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
