Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I have demons in me.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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