I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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