Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
