do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
