HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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