just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
People in love make me want to vomit
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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