Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
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