i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Holy sore nipples Batman
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
