i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
