How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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