Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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