U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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