You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
NoShamevember. You game?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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