No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
