Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Randomize