And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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