"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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