Fine. I'll sleep in my office
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Randomize
