I feel like abortions should bother me more
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
