I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
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