my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
vagina is talking i cant
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
