we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
