i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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