In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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