I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
