obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
