Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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