yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
