So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
