If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize