He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
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